INFINITY ON HIGH

free your mind.

2012-01-15T00:51:00.000-08:00

040212

Vertical Horizon-Everything You Want.

You know,I am truly sick of people asking me why I'm still single.What's wrong with me being single ?

Here's the thing,why would I want to get into a relationship,when I know that I am not going to be giving it my all.I am just a broken person,and I am honestly wishing that someone would fix me already,like honestly I am emotionally damaged.Not only that,but I hate going out,I am like the human version of a sloth.I am bi-polar,serious anger management issues,my mood swings are something I will never be able to control.Lets see,I also hate texts and calls,I just don't have the patience for that shit,like to talk about my day and how I'm doing,I have my journal to help me out there.And getting each other gifts damn it,when a guy or to be much more specific,your boyfriend,gets you a gift,its almost like you're obliged to get him a gift too and I really do not have the time for that.Dear good lord,what has become out of me ? No clue.Yes,all I want is for me to be able to get my cuddle sessions and just chill at his place,and not do anything else,yes I do like someone,and once again I am restricting myself.Too afraid of taking one step further,there's always another wound to discover.The song that I am currently listening to is oh so perfect for the situation that I am currently facing.Or maybe even Coldplay's -Fix You.

When will I ever be fixed ? Or maybe there just is that someone out there,who doesn't give a crap just like I do.

If you have any intention on making me happy,play me a Beyonce song,any time.

I look up to her.Why ? She is like the male version of Boyd.

Because of her,I have named almost everything that I own after her alter ego personality,Sasha Fierce.

Yes,seriously.

280112

Hey loves,thank you for all the wishes and gifts.I appreciate it,really.Meeting Foster The People with Melissa for my birthday was truly pure joy,but it wasn't as good as getting lost in KL right after the concert with Trecia,you have no idea how grateful I am to be around a person with such warmth.Dinner with the old gang,Melissa,Vanessa,May Chen,Jerald,Matthew,Natasha and Balqis really made my day.Catching up on our old stories.How much things have changed over a period of one year.Then head over to have my drinking session with Eng Hoe,Addie Loh and Putra.Now for those of you guys who don't know,well I known these boys for 13 years now.Yes whoah,I felt so loved.Addie really understands me,I mean well he gives really bad advice,but I am blaming that on the beer.But hey thank you everyone.You know I love you.

When december draws to a close the words ‘I can’t believe how quickly this year has gone’ are uttered by most of us. More often than not this statement is infused with a sense of regret, a year let slip by. Alas I couldn’t have been happier to see the end of 2011. To see old friends and gain many new ones. To have also reached and passed any goals that I had set down.

To also thank all those who have assisted me, inspired me and helped me to reach my goals in the last year, I won’t write a list, you know who you are.It’s been an amazing ride so far and I couldn’t be more excited for the year ahead. There are some big things planned and I promise I will be focusing my energies more than ever before.

Once again, a humble and gracious thank you to every single one of you.

LATELY

More important
than breakfast
is waking up next to someone
and having them gently touch your face
without you even asking.

‐ DALLAS CLAYTON

Love & Stay Fierce

Man Down.

2011-06-08T18:59:00.000-07:00

I have been bummed out by people and their negative remarks,for instance like how their life sucks just because they can't go out,just because they got dumped,just because they had one shitty day.Come on man,get a grip and look around yourself.Open your eyes.Are you not looking at the bigger picture.Life.Well honestly I really enjoyed this year,I mean come on I have met such amazing people who have changed my life.Having LMFAO with me backstage for my birthday,an amazing friend yes Trecia who helped me meet the one that completes me,yes Brandon Charles Boyd.Everything has changed,I have changed.Honestly I know this is cheesy and all but,Taylor Swift has influenced me big time.But yeah I admit that I have gotten caught up with the whole fairy-tale like life.Its a dream,everyone has one.I am just overly obsessed with Disney Movies.Reunions have been held throughout the year,it amazes me how most of my friends have gone downhill.I mean sorry,who am I to say something like that right.I was just in shock thats all.But hey its a few more days till my mama's birthday,and a new year ! cheers loves,and stay fierce.

Pity those who talk negatively or in bad blood; for either they do not possess the intellect to constructively criticise or are too insecure to applaud another.

‐ YYX

The media,its makes everything seem boring.

And so I am taking a break away from it.

Blogging,only pictures will be posted up.

As I am spending more time with my journal.

Yay literature !

xoxo loves.

I have been away,busy watching The Walking Dead for Steve Yeun & Norman Reedus,

And Supernatural for the Winchesters.

life is good.

thank you for the most awesome second semester ever guys.

Mr.De & Ms.Nancy,best lecturers EVER.

Rest In Peace,Mr.Jeff Pelland.

Broga was super fun because of you !

Rest In Peace,Joshua Timothy Louis.

I want to be submerged in water.

ice cold water.

surfing,soon.

such beautiful waves.

Yes I think you look way too adorable with your huge ass glasses.

Yes,yes & yes.

And high up above or down below
When you're too in love to let it go
But if you never try you'll never know
Just what you're worth.

What you've got boy is hard to find
Think about it all about it all the time
I'm all strung up my heart is fried
I just cant get you off my mind.

love ? yes.

Life seemed rather daunting. It seems so to me even now. Life seemed like too long a time to have to stick around, a huge span of years through which one would be required to tap-dance and smile and be Great! and be Happy! and be Amazing! and be Precocious! I was tired of my life by the time I was sixteen. I was tired of being too much, too intense, too manic. I was tired of people, and I was incredibly tired of myself. I wanted to do whatever Amazing Thing I was expected to do -- it might be pointed out that these were my expectations, mine alone -- and be done with it. Go to sleep. Go to a heaven where there was nothing but bathtubs and books.

I felt like I was going out of my mind. My head was never quiet. Quiet is an in-between point, implying a balance between noise and silence, between the strange blackouts I began to have -- pure silence, not sleeplike but deathlike -- and the hellish shrieking jumble of my own thoughts and the voices of the world. And the sharp hiss of one voice that started out softly, as though below layers of moss, or flesh, and gradually became so loud it drowned out everything else: Thinner, it said. You've got to get thinner. But you know, even then, that word was wrong. It is more than Thinness, per se, that you crave. It is the implication of Thin.

You have proven your thesis that no-body-loves-me-every-body-hates-me, guess-I'll-just-eat-worms.

You begin to forget what it means to live. You forget things. You forget that you used to feel all right. You forget what it means to feel all right because you feel like shit all the time, and you can't remember what it was like before.

Look at all that carpeted moss,ain't it beautiful ?

I want a mossy room too.

As a single footstep will not make a path on the earth, so a single thought will not make a pathway in the mind. To make a deep physical path, we walk again and again. To make a deep mental path, we must think over and over the kind of thoughts we wish to dominate our lives.

-Henry David Thoreau

OKAY THE PHASE IS OVER .

I'm all out of luck but what else could I be?
I know he's yours and he'll never belong to me again
I did him wrong
So don't brag.

-----

Dear sweetheart who leaves me comments in my chat box,you really make me smile.Thank you for that.

Yes indeed I do like someone that gives me that hummingbird heat beat every time he laughs.But I have no intentions on doing anything about it you know since I am too afraid of letting anyone get through me.Too afraid of getting hurt.But then again yes I know that ruin is the road to transformation.Its funny how all his friends and my friends say that he probably he feels the same way too.Apparently they can feel it ? WELL how come I ain't feeling anything,that isn't fair.Help me understand,please.

This Incubus frontman can do no wrong. I thought he was sexy five years ago, and then he got sexier. What did my ovaries do? they exploded. Not only is he sexy, but he’s creative. He designed all his tattoos, he’s written two books, had an art show, and released a solo album last year. I had so much trouble picking just one picture.

Why He’s Hot:

Mmmm Brandon Boyd. He’s the lead singer of the insanely awesome band Incubus and not only does he have some serious pipes, but he plays the guitar and writes the songs as well. He’s so hot that even his fellow band members can’t keep their hands off of him.
He’s the quintessential delicious California boy, with the skating and surfing and perma-tan, the long lean body and casual style. He’s a really chill, laid back guy. You know those types, they are the ones that like long walks on the beach, but not in the cheesy match.com way - in the let’s smoke some weed as we walk until the sand stops and talk about how fucking intense it is that there’s a whole ‘nother world under that water over there before we find a pier to fuck under.
He rages against the machine. He’s a vegan, a feminist, and an atheist. He’s all about living not only the good life but a good life and with a smile like his, it wouldn’t be hard for him to convince you to throw on some Toms, give up bacon and join him in his hippie existence.
He’s an artist and a damn good one. He designed his own tattoos, he paints, and he and his band mate Jose drew all the art for their videoDrive. How sexy is that? I wouldn’t mind the paint on his fingers transferring to my clothes, skin and sheets, and neither would you.
Yo ho ho and a bottle of rum, look at those goddamn obliques.

People think a soul mate is your perfect fit, and that’s what everyone wants. But a true soul mate is a mirror, the person who shows you everything that is holding you back, the person who brings you to your own attention so you can change your life.Learning how to discipline your speech is a way of preventing your energies from spilling out of you through the rupture of your mouth, exhausting you and filling the world with words, words, words instead of serenity, peace and blissI'm sick of people telling me that I need a man. Maybe my life hasn't been so chaotic. It's just the world that is and the only real trap is getting attached to any of it. Ruin is a gift. Ruin is the road to transformation.

So yesterday I found a puppy in the rain,looked like a prawn at first . Named it Ganja Chewie.Brought it home,dried it up and well just say it was loved.The way it keep licking me and playing with the hairdryer,trust me it was way too adorable.Anyways it was fine with being around my son and Sookie.Finally I got a call at 2 in the morning,a few black guys were at house.I swear his text to me went on and on and ON.But I am kind of missing Chewie right now ):

This one is for you my JujuWoof wife.

things will get better,cmon its you we are talking about !

College is just messing up life like seriously.I feel so lost,like hold up for a minute, why am I even doing this ? This is pointless.

I need a break .

Luckily I've got people like Trish,Audrey,Stephen and Daniel around.

Beyonce-Countdown.

But I'm capable of taking care of myself.So if you f--k this up then go take a hike.It's a waste of my time
Shakin' it up,Goin' out to search if it's really meant to be.Then you could find a way to see.Maybe you should just shut up.Been seein' too much of you lately,and you're starting to get on my nerves.This is exactly what happened last time and it's not what we deserve.It's a, a waste of my time lately.And I'm running out of words,If it's really meant to be.Then you can find a way to see.Something the past could never change.And I'm stuck in the moment

And my heart is open.Tell me that you feel the same.

Just coming on through a terrible day,you weren't there to say the things you usually say.So I guess I've been doing fine,but not really because I'm lost without you.Never to say,you're usually here with me but not today,there was no one to talk to or to turn to when I was feeling down.Just looking back on the pages of my life,turning through the good and the bad times.

Its time to take a breather.

---

Rabin said : plus i know how you work , you barely tell guys that your not bestbuds with bout your love life . you keep it all secretive till i don't know who your having a fling with or whatever. Kinda is scary falling for a girl you don't know bout her history at all I tried getting you back .You're not bothered .Well i've been thinking bout it la and for some reason you always get way with shit with me la when you tick me off by not replying or your flings .Well i was willing to actually settle down and not juggle around talking to more than one person and like actually have something serious but without all that drama shit.well anyway the question is ready to be popped if you're actually willing to give up the other guys ,just so you know

awh (:

OH and one more thing yeah I never dated Harvinth okay people,thus meaning that he was never my ex or what so ever. You guys need to stop perceiving things differently please,plus he is just not someone I would go for . And excuse me,when are you ever going to grow up ? Already got your balls shoved down your throat.Honestly you're just someone I would never want to see again. Well he was at first but not any more,done with him and he's done with me . Clear ? Get your shit together mate.

Penang.

crazy nights with my ladies.

and in this moment I am happy,so happy.

You know at times when people go around saying hey the single life is amazing,honestly I think they're talking crap.I mean yeah its super at first,those drunken nights,adorable boys /girls or whatever but still don't you get that feeling where you just want to cuddle up with someone or just hangout for abit ? I do,I miss having someone ugh :/ be mine already someone,i'm tired .

I drink to thaaaaaaaat.

Life's too short to be sittin' round miserable
People gon' talk whether you doing bad or good, yeah
Got a drink on my mind and my mind on my money, yeah
Looking so bomb, gonna find me a honeyyy
Got my Ray-Bans on and I'm feelin' hella cool tonight, yeah
Everybody's vibin' so don't nobody start a fight, yeah-ah-ah-ah.

I don't know if this lifestyle is born out of neccesity, a survival instinct, or if there's something in the blood that keeps a person on the run. But after a while the foreign places start to feel familiar - the road and the spaces in between towns begin to feel like home. The more time I spend roaming around the more I know that townie was right. You can lose yourself on the road. You can forget where you're going, what you love, and whatever it is you've been looking for your whole life.

----

You know those number thingy's on facebook where you request for a person to write about you,

this is what May Chen wrote,I am missing her even more right now , Her warm hugs every morning and her crazy stories about me being a Mexican prostitute .

1401- OMG almost 10 years man, we know each other. And we are still doing awesomely awesome ^^. I really want to thank you for introducing me to pop culture, influencing my interest in music and fashion. Thank you girl for making me go crazy, or I'll still be in a book, learning accounts. XD You really have no idea how much you shaped me in terms on personality ^^.

AWH RIGHT ? <3

Yes I finally met BrandonCharlesBoyd .

My life,its complete now.

So true,so goddamn true .

Why the hell am I always so unlucky its like I'm jinxed for life or something .

Why for once can't I get what I want ?

Bye Boyd.

Time to disappear again,can't deal with this depression right now.

And to the idiot who commented in my chat box,first of all grow some balls and use your name lah if you

want to call me fat . Is it wrong for a person to be fat ? fucking narrow minded.

Random texts that make my day (':

Can't wait for Season 3 of Parenthood & Season 7 of Supernatural.

Zeek: Amber, you know, I was two years in Viet Nam. Do you know what I thought about, what I dreamt about? Coming home, having a family, having grandkids. I dreamt you, Amber. And Haddie, and Drew, and Sydney and Max. We almost lost ya Amber. You've had some bad breaks. You're not feeling good about yourself. You didn't get into Berkeley? Well boo friggin who. You got to suck it up girl, you're a Braverman. You got my blood in your veins. If you ever do something like this again, if you even think of doing something like this again, I will kick your little butt all the way from here to the Golden Gate Bridge. You do not have my permission to mess with my dreams. Are we clear?

<3

You know those moments when an idea hits you in the face like a right hook? An epiphany sent from god? An idea so unique and so unthought of you chuckle to yourself and begin to preempt the praise you’ll receive for being so ahead of the curve? I had that not two or three days ago;Devastated.

DM: I feel like a night in with some pretty young thing curled up next to me.

YY: I would have KILLED for that shit tonight. That or an intimate candle lit dinner hiding from the rain.

DM: The irony is… to manifest that scenario, you must first enter the unforgiving wilderness of ‘nightlife’ to snare yourself some prey. The antithesis of a cosy night in. This is the paradox of dating. I’m good at the second part. just not so good with the mack part.

Seconded.

Tinie Tempah - Till I'm Gone ft. Wiz Khalifa

Ok I’m in it, I’m in it to the finish

I keep them bottles coming like my card aint got no limit
Got some friends that playing football
And some friends that playing cricket
And a mistress that is fine like a f-cking parking ticket

I love reading up on astrology and stuff,read this CLICK.

so true man,so true except for the being patient part.

Capricorns make it difficult to get close emotionally because once they let someone in, they do not want to let them go and emotional connection makes them feel vulnerable yet satisfied at the same time. This is an ongoing internal conflict of contradictions inside the Capricorn's mind.

So tell me how does it feel like being played by in your own game ? You must be feeling like crap now.

Thought you could have everything & anything ? You sad child . Grow up yeah ?

I feel sorry for you . How many times do you want to delete me off facebook ? HAHA

So yesterday was my baby girls birthday,my bezzie MelissaSiriratLazarus.

It was like a 5 Gigih reunion or something,oh all the good times we shared.

Shopping with See Seng can drive you insane.

EdmondChin,I love you forevers & evers my adorable chinese.

Finally got to spend time with my love MatthewChan,FINALLY.

BalNatashaZeeJiunJaikishenMichyIntan <3

Edmond Chin :

Okay.Done.You owe me a date now.

AWH (':

The contest hasn't even ended yet,but the amount of strangers willing to help me.

Staying up to help me till 3 in the morning.

Getting the video 555 views in a day and a half.

Not bad for a newbie,nah mean ?

SO goddamn grateful.

Having TreciaTan,Melissa,Divoshini,AkshayOliver,RineshJohn,

SugumarKesavan,AshwinBalakrishnan and the rest.

you guys seriously made me oh so happy,after the breakdown I was about to have.

(':

Hey mates & readers,do me a solid would you just this ONE TIME.

After years and years of waiting,I may finally get the chance to meet the one person i idolize .

Brandon Charles Boyd.

So please who ever you ever,just vote for me yeah ?

Thanks .

PLEASE VOTE FOR ME ♥ !And IF you could please get your friends to vote too cause I REALLY need this .http://www.pineapplekl.com/incubus/latest_list

Yee Jiun says :

3) When does this person look best ? - When she wears a skirt :p

Currently working on the video,I really appreciate having people like Ehsan Karimy & Akshara around.

Everything is going great,time to wrap it up by tonight !

Interviewer: We’re obsessed with Supernatural creatures. Are there any Jensen would like his character to face off with?

Jensen: It would be nice to maybe wipe out the whole cast of True Blood out,Vampire Diaries… show them, show them how vampires are really supposed to die. We’ve been killing these guys for six years.

Working so hard on the "Promises,Promises" cover ,all this for Boyd damn.

Losing hope,no shit.

BUT then came alone my panai and yeah she's my motivation to never give up.

Trecia : and PS: all you do in the car is SING. and now u say u suck at singing?REALLY ?We made a deal, shivany! There's no way you can fish a compliment out of me! Hahaha. but no, your singing doesn't suck at all lah.

                             or heck, you can even make a decent cover of it, a creative one, rap some of the lyrics! 

The comments on my chat box once again,makes me laugh oh so hard at times.First of all,what's up with

asking me to face reality ? This is reality . Unless you've got your brains shoved up your ass just like your life.

And to those of you who to defend me,I love you oh so much. Seriously .

It's just straight into that gossip, you don't have any fizz,
A lot of people read your crap this is web pollution,
This is why I ain't complaining bitch over free promotion
If you just called me a cunt in some other word like __
But after this you'll be the one sucking a whole lot of dick
You brought my popularity ratings higher than ever,
Thank you, your whole bullshit comments have worked real clever!
Before I answer you bitch, let me spit one question:
If you hate me so much, what's up with your obsession?
I just do my things tight and I don't care about hypes
So run back to your computer, your mom, and your crack pipe.

We got our shit all tight we don't care about you jealous-ass whores.
From getting off your couch get a fucking life instead of staying on internet .

I miss Hisham,he loved my legs. Why'd you have to leave to Aussie so soon ? )':

Hung out with with Akshara my horny lover and Emad my pink lips.

I swear his lips,I want to bite em'

I can be tough, I can be strong
But with you it's not like that at all
There's a girl that gives a shit
Behind this wall, you've just walked through it .

It's just one of those things
You'll have to get over it
Don't turn around
I'm sick and I'm tired of your face.

Jeremy ;

oh go to col oso nvr tell.
babi i cal dun wana cme.
Shivany SenthilNathan :
- I DAMN FAT LIKE A BABI ALREADY

Its because of guys like him that cause girls like ME to put our standards oh so high when it comes down to

choosing someone.

Move to Brazil ? That would be just lovely.

Comments made in response to my cries of frustration? “You have to be a dick to guys and you’re too picky”.

What was being said was that I’m too nice and should lower my standards. That being mean to guys is a sure fire way to get them to like you, and that I shouldn’t look for the guy of my dreams, but to be happy with mediocrity in love. This is probably the worst advice I’ve ever been given regarding romance. Apparently my kindness and knowing what I want in a partner are negative attributes… Really?

So what is it that women are really after? A bad boy? A real man? A jerk? One who’ll treat them mean in the beginning winning their favour for not playing straight into their hands, only later to turn into prince charming once proved worthy? Games!

Who have I really fallen in love with and who have I given to fall for? I believe it’s an insecurity that’s riddled through our generation, an insecurity of really being yourself, of being vulnerable. The horror of rejection crippling our betterselves into behaving how they would want us to behave, not how we would naturally. We’re taught to not be excited or over enthusiastic in love, feigned apathy being the preferred method of behaviour. Fuck that. If there’s one thing in this world you should lose your shit for, it’s love.

When falling for another, one should be naught but the truest of themselves. Be insecure and vulnerable, be cautious and nervous. Be a dick or a c*nt if you actually are one. Own up the real person you are and have faith in that by being yourself you’ll find the right one. But most of all, jump. Jump & fall, fall spectacularly and give everything over. If you fail, you fail, but you’ll do it with fucking 10′s on your scorecard.

Frank Sinatra-Strangers In The Night.

awh (:

A 1967 Chevy Impala,is the car of my dreams.

Yes with Dean Winchester in it.

Darling,I Do.

2011-04-09T22:56:00.000-07:00

Just got a tweet from my idol Odette Yustman,I love Trecia Tan oh so much right now <3

Due to depression,I cut my nails off after 6 months.

Bani,Emad,Mazen,Akshara,Trecia & Divo must be really proud of me.

I am currently against the Canadians ?

Yeah well not only because of their all time favourite Seal Hunting activity.

So annoyed with people telling me that I used to be a much nicer person,

people change-shit happens.

I don't have the time to please everyone.

yea ya talk shit, think i care?
my style in this flow, is confusin cause ya dont know

Write me this, sing me that
Love is the essence of all our tracks
Now it's gone and stakes is high
I am double under depths in lies
I'm a lost child, don't you see.

Oh and one more thing,please to those of ya'll on facebook,

please stop asking me for this , " intro please ? "

like what the heck,how does one even answer such a stupid question.

Everyone showing love; much love back. Those throwing hate; much love back. x

Keep calm and listen to the tunes of Kula Shaker & Takagi Masakatsu & Devendra Banhart.

http://fuckyeahmodelboys.tumblr.com/page/

Where does one find a man who dresses in Lacoste,Fred Perry, Burberry & Topshop items ?

Everclear-Father Of Mine.

I loved it when you held me high
I loved to hear you talk
You would take me to the movie
You would take me to the beach
You would take me to a place inside
That is so hard to reach .

I miss bands like OAG,their song Generasiku.

Sheila on 7-Pemuja Rahasia <3

& Butterfingers.

I meet you. I remember you. Who are you? You’re destroying me. You’re good for me. How could I know this city was

tailor-made for love? How could I know you fit my body like a glove? I like you. How unlikely. I like you. How slow all of a sudden. How sweet. You cannot know. You’re destroying me. You’re good for me. You’re destroying me. You’re good for me. I have time. Please, devour me. Deform me to the point of ugliness. Why not you? Why not you in this city and in this night, so like other cities and other nights you can hardly tell the difference? I beg of you.

Can't wait to have a movie marathon with Divo & Trecia this Friday <3

Trecia is not used to the fact that she is not able to hear me gush about Mr.Mike.

Mashed potato,horror movies and chick flicks baby !

Yellowcard-Only One.

Bad reputation,such a good girl.

Sem Break has officially begun !

The way Mr.Mike said my name yesterday,

AHHHHHH happiness.

Only Trecia & Divo knew how great that felt (;

I long to watch you speak. I have, and do, and will. Your mouth; lips, tongue, teeth and the way they interact with one another haphazardly is potentially the most amazing thing I have ever seen.

This is where I stand. In the vast unknown, direction is meaningless. Feelings are vague and decisions are pointless. With no orientation of where one stands, confusion and panic set in.
I fear I’m falling, but can’t be sure.
To new beginnings. To the pursuit of...somethingness.

All night
Hearing voices telling me
That I should get some sleep
Because tomorrow might be good for something
Hold on
I'm feeling like I'm headed for a
Breakdown
I don't know why
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little unwell
I know, right now you can't tell
But stay awhile and maybe then you'll see
A different side of me
I'm not crazy, I'm just a little impaired
I know, right now you don't care
But soon enough you're gonna think of me
And how I used to be
Me .

----

Cousins just came down from Penang.

And the first thing they asked me was " WHY THE HELL ARE YOU SO DARK !?"

Okay its because of the camping trip at Broga Hills 2 weeks ago.

Obviously the Sun Block Lotion was no help at all.

Sem break is about to start,

time to hibernate at home with lemons !

)':

Green Day - When I Come Around . <3

Why do the both of ya'll have to be so pathetic ?

Girl,please grow up.

Boy,give up already ?

motherchuds.

I still write.
I still express my darkest and truest (one in the same), but pile them in drafts and falter at the last line in commitment.

Why? I’m not sure. I know they’ll disapprove. I know it’ll spread. Speculation and assumption the worst of enemies.

I’m slowly learning the deepest of myself, the strongest and weakest and feel as though one day I’ll be sure enough to express without hesitation, to talk without fear, or question without pause.
Today is not that day.

and in this moment I am happy,so happy.

New Aim;

To go out on a date with my lecturer,Mr.Mike Donald.

No shit.

SO GODDAMN GOOD LOOKING.

With his read hair like Rupert Grint,oh yum.

And his arms hmm.

first sem is about to end,depressing.

its something unpredictable,but in the end its right.
BLACK TEAM !
x

awh (:

♥

SO a lot of people have been asking me the same old crappy questions,

like have I moved on ? or am I jealous that he has someone new ?

truth be told -

I guess you just forgot how to pick 'em.If she's the one,I've heard about-I'm disappointed.

If she's the reason why you left,I'm not impressed at all.Well,this looks like the end.Yeah.
We can still be friends.Let me be the first,to wish you the worst.'Cause I think you deserve each other.
Let me be the curse,that creeps under your skin.Until your heart,caves in.
And you'd wish-She was me again,and again.Well, someone had to tell the truth,and I'm always honest.
I read you,like an open book.And it's obvious to me,she's just the one in between. Heading no where fast.

There's always something
In the way
There's always something
Getting through
But it's not me
it's You

Sometime's ignorance
Rings true
But hope is not in
What I know
Not in me
It's in You

It's all I know

And I find peace
When I'm confused
I find hope when
I'm let down
Not in me
But in You

I hope to lose myself
For good
I hope to find it in the end
Not in me
It's You
It's all I know

SO HOT.

I love my lady Gla Gla,we had one heck of a night with K and the rest.
Slept at 6 in the morning,spazzed.
Sometimes Indian men misplace their brains,probably up their ass.
No shit.
YEAH MAN !

hope, I just need a ray of that
cause no one see's my vision when I play it for 'em
they just say its wack
they don't know what dope is
and I don't know if I was awake or asleep
when I wrote this,

Awe,love you lah boyfie <3

Nirvana - In Bloom

I never respond to the comments in my chat box,BUT i do read them.

A fantasy is what you need
Another's life to live and breathe
Well how am I supposed to even try?
You wear me out , you dig in deep
You hardly make your own deceipt
Consequence will find you at the line

It's gone away
to burn burn down
But im okay
Cause I cant hear those words you say

This is the day
I'm taking back that life you stole away.

You're so edgy
You don't even need a rhyming dictionary

I'm leaving my fingerprints on you.

If you want me, it takes more than a wink,
And more than a drink and more than you think.
Cause some don’t have the patience, some call me high-maintenance

Seems a little different,

Hard to say,
But it looks like the end.

We could talk all day
About your eccentricities
What I mean to say is that I need you to listen please !
And focus on life's simplicities
So don't be afraid to strip it away
Cause at the end of the day
It's still as simple as it seems
Time's up.

I'm tired I really am.

Just not in the mood to speak to anyone or reply texts or answer calls.

Too much shit going on around me.

Things need to slow down.

So overwhelmed .

Prom.

Exams.

Presentations.

Bloody hell,I need to roll it up & take a hit.

Incubus-Adolescents.

Brandon Charles Boyd.

Avid readers of my blog and those close to me would know how obsessed I am,

when it comes to him.

After 6 years of waiting.

My dreams will be fulfilled.

Blessed.

People keep on pestering me to post up videos,I know I make you smile :D

SOON.

Justin Bieber's -Down to Earth is replayed over and over again.

amazing song.

I'm tired,I really am.

Prom,mates want me to go but I'm like ugh why.

Lupe's-The Show Goes On <3

Classmates call me a Teacup Poodle.

Thanks to Hevin,its because of my hair pfft.

Also known as brownie,quite cute right :D

zooey deschanel-magic trick.

“Yes, our bones ache, our dogs are barkin’, our shoes have holes in them, and we don’t look as good with our shirts off anymore. But that doesn’t mean we won’t keep walking! And conversing along the way. I’d like to start thinking of success less as an opiate and more of a segue into the good parts of a conversation.”

— Brandon Boyd, If Not Now, When?

Only You | Portishead

Its a must that I bring her album along everywhere I go.

Even to college.

Even writing the number 13 on my hand.

Yeah sad case right ._.

Whenever I'm feeling lost and insecure,listening to her songs,It helps.

Hevin,its time to rejoice the truth .

I sing Bieber's song Never Say Never everyday without fail to Divo.
Even named my essay after that song !
Why doesn't anyone wanna accompany me to watch his movie ?
)':

She never fails to make me smile every morning with her retardedness.

For those of ya'll who don't know,I've been having a bad day.

Till I met Pn Khoo after class.

She was my Literature teacher,oh she meant the world to me <3

Especially when I aced it for SPM,I hugged her and she cried.

And today ,she kept saying I look like a model and I'm so pretty.

AH YESSSS I NEEDED THE CONFIDENCE BOOST :D

I'd want the interior of my house to look like the above,please & thank you.